Published: 8 hours ago

Mental health experts are calling for urgent awareness and recognition of emotional abuse, warning that it is a silent but deadly form of violence driving many cases of depression and suicide in Zimbabwe.

Community psychologist Nozipho Mojapelo described emotional abuse as a "silent epidemic", particularly prevalent in today's modern dating culture - known as mjolo - where it is often disguised as love or care.

"Abuse is not always about bruises," Mojapelo said.

"Sometimes it's the words, the tone, or even the silence that destroys a person."

Mojapelo explained that emotional abuse can take many forms - constant criticism, humiliation, manipulation, threats, or gaslighting - where the abuser makes the victim question their own reality or sanity.

Because it leaves no visible marks, she said, many people fail to recognise it, often mistaking control for affection.

"I have met women who believe being called 'useless' or 'a failure' by their partners is a form of discipline or motivation," Mojapelo said.

"That's slow psychological damage - it destroys confidence and self-worth."

On gaslighting, she added:

"When someone constantly denies your truth, they are not seeking peace - they are taking your power."

Mojapelo linked emotional abuse to unresolved trauma, citing cases where individuals replicate toxic behaviours they witnessed growing up.

"One young man shouted at his girlfriend because he believed it was how a man shows authority," she recalled.

"I told him what he called authority was actually inherited pain."

Such abuse, she warned, often leads to anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts, particularly among young people trapped in toxic relationships.

Mojapelo urged communities to stop trivialising emotional abuse as mere "relationship drama" and instead treat it as a serious mental health and social issue.

"Words can build or destroy. When used to destroy, they leave invisible scars that take years to heal," she said.

She encouraged those suffering from emotional abuse to seek professional help, join support groups, or confide in trusted friends or family.

Mojapelo also called for early awareness and emotional education, urging people to understand a potential partner's background and conflict-resolution skills before committing.

"A person who cannot handle conflict without shouting or threatening may already show signs of emotional abuse," she said.

Her final message was one of empowerment and healing:

"Love should heal, not humiliate. It should bring peace, not fear.

We must start naming the pain - because healing begins when we stop hiding our scars."
- Southern Eye